I’ve got something that I’m really excited to share with you that I’ve been working on for the past few months. It is a new podcast called, “Speaking With Deacons”, which I hope will give inspiration and insight for those who are ordained to, in formation for, or just curious about the permanent diaconate. In the first episode, I share about how I feel God has called me to be a deacon and I think you will be blessed by that (even if you are not a deacon). Future episodes (they will be released every other week) will feature interviews with deacons, hence the title of the show. It will be about hearing their stories and getting their advice. These interviews are part of my own journey to becoming a deacon, as I know I’ve got a lot to learn! So I invite you to be a part of that journey with me. 

I was joking with my friend Gene (who helped me set the podcast up) that this podcast is the the definition of a “niche” market. Of the 14K active permanent deacons in the US, the majority are over 65 and may not know what a podcast is or how to listen to one! But that’s okay. It is a labor of love. 

The #1 reason people listen to a podcast is through the recommendation of someone else. So please, if you know someone who is a deacon or is considering it, mention this podcast to them. And to God be all the glory!

Here’s the five minute clip on YouTube:

And here is the full 30 minute episode:

And the here are the major links to the audio podcast:

Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/speaking-with-deacons/id1551646012

Google Podcasts: https://www.google.com/podcasts?feed=aHR0cHM6Ly9zcGVha2luZ3dpdGhkZWFjb25zLmxpYnN5bi5jb20vcnNz

Spotify: https://speakingwithdeacons.libsyn.com/spotify

Yesterday was May the Fourth, and today we celebrate the Revenge of the Fifth. So it seems like a good time for me to share my definitive conclusion about the latest Star Wars movie, The Rise of Skywalker. Also, Tim Hepburn (my drummer) just asked me what I thought about it, and I figured he’d want it in writing.

I saw the movie four, maybe five times in the theater. I purchased the Visual Dictionary which was supposed to answer some of the many unanswered questions that lingered after the final questions. I paid attention to interviews with the creative team behind the movie to see if I might glean more information about the story they were trying to tell. I just finished the novelization of the movie yesterday.

I feel like I’ve seen and read everything there is to learn about Rise of Skywalker and have come to this conclusion: The Rise of Skywalker is the worst Star Wars movie ever made.

It was actually hard for me to come to that conclusion. I’m a huge Star Wars nerd and, by default, I usually love everything that comes after that trumpet fanfare and opening logo. I’m also a generally optimistic person and look for the good in everything. So I kept thinking it would get better if I watched it a few more times, or thought about it more, or read the book.

But the more I read and the more I watched, the worse it got. Perhaps there is more information out there, but at this point, it would not make it any better. I have no doubt it is the worst Star Wars movie that has ever been made.

However, I don’t think that it is the worst movie with the name of Star Wars attached to it that was ever made. That distinction goes to Attack of the Clones. From a cinematic perspective, Rise is a better film: it looks better, has great pace, and the actors give some great performances. However, Attack of the Clones, with all its faults, at least advances the storyline. Obi-Wan finds the clone army. Anakin and Padme fall in love and get married. The Clone Wars begin.

The only storyline that Rise attempts to advance is nonsensical gibberish that hits the nostalgia button any time your brain attempts rational thought. It is a type of pornography in that it only provides the briefest plot necessary to get to the action scene.

Nowhere was this more evident than in the novelization. I’ve read the novels for all the new trilogy, and I really enjoyed The Force Awakens and The Last Jedi books. They added depth to the characters and the story. But Rise read like a desperate attempt to explain away plot holes so big you could fly the Death Star through them, and by doing so revealed just how poorly written the movie actually was.

Let’s take one example, perhaps it’s most egregious. In The Force Awakens we encounter Ray, a woman has incredible power in the force but doesn’t know who her parents are. In The Last Jedi we learn that her parents were “nobodies”, and you don’t have to have a “bloodline” to be active in the force (which is what the “dark side” kept saying you needed). Personally, I thought that message was one of the best things about the movie.

The Rise of Skywalker awkwardly backtracks on that narrative and instead, Rey is the granddaughter of Emperor Palpatine! There were a lot of questions about this, the most obvious being, “who would sleep with this guy?” We were told to wait for the novel, it will explain everything!

Here is what happened, according to the book. The body of Palpatine you see in the movie is actually a clone that he sent his mind to as he was falling down the shaft in Return of the Jedi. But the clone wasn’t ready (darn!). So his followers kept trying to create a clone strand off the faulty Palpatine clone that might survive. One strand was promising, and this was his “son”. However, his “son” couldn’t use the force. At some point, his son had a child (with a non-clone?), Rey. But they didn’t want the Emperor to have her, so they left her on Jakku so the Emperor wouldn’t get her because, obviously, she would be a great human body for the Emperor to take over when she got older.

Of course, none of this was in the movie… or even makes sense. How does the human child of a force-impotent father become so strong in the force? How did her parents meet and have a child in the first place? Why did they not want the Emperor to have her (she would be the Empress, after all)? How did they escape from the Emperor’s grasp in the first place? Remember, this “son” was the only hope for the Sith existence, so you’d like to think they were, I don’t know, paying attention to him?

It feels like for every question that Rise brings up the writing team provides an even more complicated answer, hoping you’ll get tired and give up asking. There is so much about the movie you have to read a book (or books) to understand… and then you still don’t.

For example, what was Finn trying to tell Rey before he thought he was going to die? Not that he loved her, of course. That he was “force-senstive”! It is in the book! Silly audience, why would you think Finn loved Rey just because it was alluded to in the previous two movies?

Oh, and that kiss between Rey and Ben at the end of Rise? Did you think that was romantic? Foolish viewer. According to the book, and this is a direct quote, “And then, wonder of wonders, she leaned forward and kissed him. A kiss of gratitude, acknowledgement of their connection, celebration that they’d found each other at last.”

A kiss of gratitude! Of course! So, is that what the two women were giving each other in the final celebration? (Actually, no. The book also informs you they were married but didn’t like public shows of affection, which is why you didn’t know it until just then.)

There are just so many problems with the movie. How did the Emperor build ten thousand Star Destroyers, with an estimated compliment of about 50,000 people in them each (so that would be half a billion people just to run them, let alone build them) in a part of the Universe that was inaccessible (don’t get me started on the red “maze” they had to fly through… this is space, right? You can’t fly around it?). Since when was C-3PO’s memory backed up by R2D2… and why would that be a thing? Does some other droid back up R2’s memory? And what happened for those many years when R2 shut down because Luke went into hiding?

GAHHH!

The first movie of the trilogy, The Force Awakens, left a lot of unanswered questions. I was okay with that… it was the first movie of the trilogy. The last movie is supposed to answer questions, not raise new ones. It is supposed to resolve lingering storylines, not rehash previous plot points that had already been told, like the Emperor on a throne trying to get a young Jedi to turn while a battle rages in the distance. It was done better 35 years ago—a fitting epitaph for almost everything Star Wars (except the Mandalorian?).

I thought Force Awakens was a bit too much like A New Hope, but at the time I was happy to see an enjoyable Star Wars movie and really liked the potential of the new characters. I thought The Last Jedi did some really intriguing things and had some incredible moments, so I was excited to see what happened next. Rise was poorly written nonsense that seemed to try to cater to those who didn’t like The Last Jedi and in doing so pleased nobody.

I have friends who hated The Last Jedi and enjoyed Rise. I think it would be hard to find someone who likes both since the storylines, and even philosophy, are at odds with each other. Perhaps a reader might say, “The Last Jedi was the worst Star Wars movie, and Rise tried to redeem it!” Well, did it? No.

The movie isn’t without its good moments—I was happy to see Ren become Ben Solo (one thing everyone can agree on: Adam Driver’s performance was the best thing about the sequel trilogy). I suppose if you want to eat popcorn and watch a sci-fi movie that reminds you of Star Wars, you might enjoy it.

But even a part of your brain starts asking… does this make sense? Perhaps you assume that it would make more sense if you were a more avid fan.

Let me tell you, as an avid fan, it doesn’t. In fact, it makes things worse. That is why, for me, The Rise of Skywalker is the worst Star Wars movie ever made.

Happy belated Star Wars day, everyone.

My parish is closed until Easter. Disney World is shut down. It looks like Tom Brady is leaving the Patriots. They closed my local Bennigan’s on St. Patrick’s Day. I haven’t read the book of Revelation in a while, but I’m pretty sure these are all signs that Jesus will be back pretty soon.

Of course, there are some positives. The Cavs had a 1% chance of making the playoffs—I’m just going to say they would have made it were it not for the COVID-19 virus.

Missing Mass hurts most of all. However, it was only a few months ago the Church turned her attention to the plight of those who live in the Amazon, many of whom go years without receiving the sacraments. Going without for a few weeks seems to pale in comparison.

The challenge for those of us who are used to weekly/daily Liturgy is, how will we worship God when Mass is not available?

The same type of question was poised to the Jewish people at the time of the Exile. They were a people of ritual and sacrifice. For them, God was not “everywhere” but in a specific place: within the Ark of the Covenant inside the Holy of Holies within the Temple in Jerusalem. Then the Babylonians destroyed Jerusalem and the Temple and the Ark went missing, never to be found again until the discovery of Dr. Jones in the 1940s.

For the Jews it was as if God had been taken away from them. They were led off, in chains, to a foreign land with no priests, no sacrifice, and no temple where they could worship God.

A far worse situation than what we currently have in Ohio, or the rest of the country.

One might have thought this would have brought an end to the Jewish religion. Instead, it brought revival. No longer able to depend on the Temple sacrifices, the Hebrew people turned to the Sacred Scriptures. They build Synagogues that faced the direction toward where the temple once stood. The Rabbi—the teacher of the law—grew in prominence. It brought about an interior conversion in the people of God, and by doing so prepared a way for the coming of Jesus, who was known primarily as “Rabbi”. They studied the Word in Scripture, then the Word became flesh and dwelt among them.

Like the Exile was for the Jewish people, Lent is a time of purification and renewal. It is a time of interior conversion. There is no use wasting any energy in anger of what has occurred or why it happened the way it did. Instead of asking “Why did this happen?” (negative reaction) we should ask, “Lord, what do you want me to do about it?” (positive reaction).

In writing to the Christians in Rome (which was a tough place to be in the first century), St. Paul wrote, “We know that all things work for good for those who love God, who are called according to his purpose” (Romans 8:28). Our God has made a career of taking bad situations and turning them into good (for example… the cross). This is an opportunity to grow in trust.

We must also remember that none of this, none of this, is beyond His Providence. When the little girl seemed dead and Jesus was told not to bother, he responded, “Fear is useless. What is needed is faith” (Mark 5:36). This is an opportunity to grow in faith.

As the prophet Habakkuk watched the armies from Babylon march into Jerusalem, and he couldn’t figure out why God would let such a thing happen. If you haven’t read that book of the Bible, you should. It is a beautiful example of someone wrestling with God’s will. He ends with a prayer of hope (another opportunity to grow), which I think is a great prayer for all of us:

For though the fig tree does not blossom, and no fruit appears on the vine, Though the yield of the olive fails and the terraces produce no nourishment, Though the flocks disappear from the fold and there is no herd in the stalls, Yet I will rejoice in the LORD and exult in my saving God (Habakkuk 3:17-18).

Praising God when things are good is natural. Praising God when things are bad? Supernatural. Let us ask the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with a song of praise during these trying times, mindful of the many who may be suffering more than we are right now. May the joy of the Lord be our strength.

Have you ever been to the Holy Land? I’ve had the chance to have visited there three times so far. I’m not exaggerating when I say that I believe that every disciple of Jesus Christ should try at least once in their life to physically walk where Jesus walked.

Doing so opens up the Scriptures in a whole new way. When you visit the place where Jesus told Peter, “You are rock, and upon this rock I will build my Church,” you get to see the cliff in the distance that Jesus was referring to. When you go to where Jesus preached the Sermon on the Mount and said, “look how the wildflowers grow… if God so clothes the grass of the field, will he not much more provide for you?”, you can see the beauty of the wildflowers growing on the hill.

Many call the Holy Land, “the Fifth Gospel” because, like the Gospels themselves, it is one of the best way of understanding and experiencing Jesus. I had studied Scripture most of my life and I thought I knew it pretty well. And then I went to the Holy Land and saw everything in a new way.

Here is what I am confident about: if you have never been to the Holy Land, a pilgrimage there will change your life. I’ve never had someone go to the Holy Land and describe their experience as “just okay”. It will deepen your relationship with Jesus. There is a grace that comes from the ground. You will celebrate Mass where Jesus was born, lived, died, and rose again.

So that’s my main point: at some point in your life, go to the Holy Land.

Okay, here is a secondary and not as important point as the first: would you like to come with me?

I’ll be honest, I don’t “do” pilgrimages, though I’ve been asked many times. But Fr. Louis Merosne made me an offer that I couldn’t refuse. He is taking people to the Holy Land to raise money for the poor in Haiti. None of us are making money on the trip, and even the tour company is donating the percentage they would usually make for those in need in Haiti.

So this would be a great chance to 1) go to the Holy Land, 2) with Fr. Louis, me, Bishop Dumas, and Greg Bottaro (do you know him? He is amazing), while 3) raising money for the Haitian poor. It is February 1st to 10th next year (2020) You can find more information at https://www.pilgrimages.com/holylandforhaiti/

I can’t stress enough how amazing the Holy Land is. You need to go at some point! And pray about potentially going with us. We’d love to have you with us in February, and it would be a great help for those in need!